Hey beauts, I have been super excited to share with you guys what my latest blog post was that I have been working on. I was honestly thinking of this idea for a blog post for a while now, for some reason it is extremely interesting to me. What I find so interesting is how the generations have changed so dramatically and drasticallyBy no means am I bashing the 14-year-old generation today, I am simply comparing from when I was 14 years old to the age my little sisters are today. From topics such as social situations, friends, appearance, recreational activities, and education, you can clearly see two different generations. What scares me about this generation, however, is how fast kids are growing up these days. Literally from 14 to 20 like that, and it’s the norm. Β Having 14-year-old sisters who are in grade 9, I wanted to personally see how much our generations have changed over time. I got to see first-hand what it is like in the day of a 14-year-old girl, and I can not wait to share this interesting information with you beauts. Let’s jump right in.
First things first, I have a twin of course who I mentioned in one of my previous blog posts before, but I also have two younger 14-year-old sisters, Jennifer and Kimberly, Β who are twins as well…. shocking I know! I love it. Kimberly and Jennifer both attend a catholic high school together. I first got onto the topic of social situations and friends. I had asked Kim how many friends she had. Kimberly stated, “I have aroundΒ 60 friends, I am close to around half of them. I talk to them whenever I see them at school.”. Okay first of all, can I just say, I don’t think I have ever had so many friends in my life. When I was in grade 9 I remember having like one friend and that was my sister. We were in the same situation as Jennifer and Kimberly, new school, new people. At leastΒ ,however, they had some of their friends attending their high school with them, where as my twin and I did not know anyone. Β I then went on to ask Jennifer the same question, she stated, “I have roughly about 10 or 8 at school”.
I then proceeded to ask Kimberly if she found it important to have a lot of friends. Kimberly explains, “Yes and no. Yes because everyone at school has lots of friends, and no because sometimes I donβt talk to half of them.I think that it is okay and acceptable to not have so many friends although it would be more acceptable to have a lot”. I could not agree more with Kimberly, I feel like this generation often depends on having a lot of friends. Jennifer agreed stating, “yes because you can meet more people”.Β This leads into my next question, “If you were to only have one friend, would you consider yourself unpopular?” Kimberly states, ” Yes because everyone now has lots of friends that they see in the halls or on the weekend”. Interesting. Β There has always been the concept of popularity, and I feel like this has always been a huge thing in high school. I remember, however, that you were a big deal if you had around 6 friends, as opposed to 60. Can you tell times have changed? Would I be considered unpopular because I only have 2 main best friends? That is a question that ponders me. Do I consider myself unpopular? No. Do I think I am queen shit? No.
Jennifer answered, “Β Yes because I wouldnβt get noticed that much and I wouldnβt have a lot of people to go to, it would only be one person”.
Is there bullying in your school and a lot of gossip? Kimberly-” There is usually gossip at my school based on what a girl and a guy had done on the weekend. I usually do not hear so much about bullying however”. 14…..14…. and there is gossip about intimacy and all that jazz. I personally think I was afraid of dinkys til about like 20 no joke. I can not believe that kids as little as 14 are being spontaneous and promiscuous it blows my mind. In grade 9 I did not care about boys, I cared about making it to class on time and not getting into trouble. I was that girl 5 minutes early to every class
.I then proceeded to ask Jennifer the same question, she stated, “Yes a lot of gossip about me spreading stuff about people that is not true, itβs a vicious cycle .Β However, I donβt see bullying too much… just a lot of girl talk”.
…”I feel like others will forget about me”.
This next question also blew my mind as well. I had asked Kimberly and Jennifer if they ever felt obligated to attend parties at their age. Kimberly explains, “yes because highschool is a lot diff then elementary school. In elementary school you hang with only a couple of people where as Β at a party in high school you hang out with a lot of friends at a house. A lot of popular people go and there is the opportunity to make new friends”. What do you guys think? Do you think this should be seen as more of a pro going to parties or a con? I can see both sides. Do I agree with drinking at 14? Absolutely not. I do promote the idea of making new friends, but at a party there will be drinking, usually always. I was not involved with parties until grade 12. GRADE 12. I did not care about drinking, or trying new things. I was worried about my grades and like I said, making it to class on time. It’ a scary thing to think about when it comes to parties. I think what scares me the most is that 14 year olds are still developing and their brains are still maturing. They are obligated to make mistakes and learn from them, encounter bad decisions but fix them. I feel that a lot of 14 year olds would be under that pressure or may make a very poor decision that could affect them for the rest of their lives, and that is what scares me.
Jennifer answers, “I feel obligated Β to go to parties sometimes because if I don’t show up, I feel like others will forget about me”.
Recreational Activities
Moving onto the topic of recreational acvities. I started off by the girls what they do for fun. Kimberly answers, “Hangout with friends, go to Tim Hortons, or Macs, take pictures and post them on social media Β which is always fun”. Okay, so that is pretty standard. Jennifer explained, “I like to go on my phone Β usually on Instagram and snap chat”.
I then went on to ask them what they do for fun on the weekend. Kimberly states, “I am usually on my phone or I am on social media accounts such as Snap Chat”.Β Jennifer also agreed to the same things.Β I remember having a phone in grade 9 because we had moved to a brand new school but for safety reasons. I was only involved on Facebook I believe it was. I had no idea what snap chat was or even Instagram for that matter. I do remember texting a lot…. I was no saint. Β But when it came to the weekend, I would often hangout with the family, go bowling, go to the store to shop or hangout with some friends.
Technology
I knew this was going to be a huge topic of discussion, especially in this generation. Β Cell phones are everything. You can literally find absolutely everything on a phone and could spend hours on it. I know because being 23 years old, I do spend a lot of my time on social media and getting the latest gossip on technology. I asked Kimberly and Jennifer how often they were on their phone each day. Kimberly explained that she was mostly on her phone 5 hours a day. Jennifer went on to explain that she was on her phone from school til bed time. I was then curious to see if my predictions were correct. I thought for sure that 14-year-olds would hardly ever speak on the phone since texting is the primary form of communication. However, I was wrong. Kimberly explained that she actually is on the phone a lot of the time talking to her close friends. I do promote this since I thought for sure this form of communication would soon be forgotten, so I am happy this is still around. Β On the other hand, Jennifer stated that she would much rather text as opposed to socialize over the phone.
What kind of social media platforms do you use? Β Kimberly-“My main platform of social media that I usually go on each day would have to be Snap Chat and collecting streaks. I sometimes use Instagram here and there but could go a month with that”.
Jennifer- “Instagram and Snapchat”
Have you ever gotten your phone taken away? Can you explain more what “streaks” are on Snap Chat? Kimberly-Β “Yes I have had my Β phone taken away before because I was caught drinking alcohol with my friends. Streaks are what you collect on snap chat when you send someone a snap in a row. A good number of streaks to get would be around 200-300. You can lose your streaks within 24 hours however.
Stress
I was extremely interested in getting to know what causes my sister stress. Personally what would have caused me stress at their age would be finshing homework on time, getting things done on time and so forth, so I was excited to hear about her. There were a couple of things that stresses Kimberly out. Kim explains, “Uhhh probably getting my phone taken away and counting on my friend to keep my streaks up on Snap chat. Another thing that stresses me out is friends.Some people have friends that are in grade 11 and 12… and a lot of them.Sometimes it’s stressful because you try to make new friends but they already have their tables in cafeteria , depends where you sit and who you hang out with at school. Lastly when it comes to clothes. My friend was over the other day and she had really nice clothes and mine do not really compare to hers. She was wearing thisΒ loose sweater with tights, Β and it looked good on her. Clothes are a big deal”. This was so interesting to read and listen to. Personally, I did not care what I looked like in grade 9 at all. I had no desire to impress anyone. Β Also social media was not a huge big deal at the time in my era, which fascinates me that is what stresses some people out these days. Stress is different for everyone. That is okay.
A lot of things had stressed out Jennifer as well that I found interesting. Jennifer states, “a lot of things stress me out, usually with a boy if he doesnβt want to talk to me I get upset, being nagged to do chores, Β I Β am worried about what people think of me. Β It would bother me if they thought badly about me.” Again, it all comes down to what others think of themselves at that age.
How do you deal with stress?Kimberly- “I usually go into another room so I donβt make a huge scene to calm down. Or sometimes I facetime my friend to talk about it”.Β Kimberly also goes on to explain that she would rather keep things bottled in as opposed to talking about it. The fear of judgement is there for herself as well as for her friends. I do agree that this generation is quickly to judge. When I was 14 I spoke to my mom about everything and never really kept anything bottled in ever, or I would have lost it. To this day, I still go to my mom about everything and anything. Β Jennifer explains, “I donβt really do anything, I just stay quiet”.
This next question was a huge eye-opener, and one that made me sit back and think, “wow”, something needs to be done about this. I had asked Kimberly and Jennifer how their friends deal with stress and both gave me the same answer.. Kim explains, “most of them usually self-harm or starve themselves . Some of my friends leave and donβt tell people where they are going. That is their way of coping”.Β No wonder children are getting the wrong idea in their heads that this is a good coping mechanism, they think it is normal, and it is not. This was super scary to hear but it needs to be heard. They need to be heard. Where are the proper coping strategies and resources for these kids? They are kids right? Where is the help and where can it be found? That is the question that needs to be answered and provided.
Peer Pressure
I knew that peer pressure has always been a hard topic to discuss and it literally is always lingering around, that is nothing new. I wanted to know if the peer pressure has increased, especially for the younger crowds such as 14 year olds. I had asked the girls if they have ever been peer pressured by a boy before or to send pictures? Kim states, ” yes I was peer pressured to send pictures to a boy but I didnβt. He dropped it after I refused to send him anything, I wasnβt too peer pressured”.Β Β Jennifer stated that she did not have any boy peer pressure her into doing something she didn’t want to before.I think the part that scares me if that since 14-year-olds are still developing, they can be easily influenced for sure. If someone told me at 14 to send pictures and that they will only be the ones to see it, I probably would have believed them. Especially if I was in a relationship with that individual and truly “in love”, I would think what is the harm? Now answering that question years later, that would be the worst mistake of my life. You never know where that picture is going to end up, and how your reputation could be potentially ruined. It is not worth it. It is not worth it to be peer pressured into something. 14-year-olds, and young audiences need to know that it is okay to say no and stand your ground. Nobody can force you to do something you do not want to do.
Kim Β and Jen went on to explain that sometimes they feel peer pressured to drink with their friends, because so many people their age drink. Kim explains that the curiosity is there even though she knows it’s wrong and not the right decision. Β Since it is normal for 14-year-olds to go to parties these days, why would she think any differently?
Do you feel like you have to act or be a certain way in the views of others? Kimberly-Β “Sometimes, some of my friends are really nice and they wouldnβt ever do anything to get into trouble. Whenever I am around those groups of friends, I act that way. Some of my other friends, ,however,Β donβt care sometimes..so you can say I am not myself around all of my friends”.Β
Jennifer- “yes I can not be myself in public, I can not be goofy. I canβt act weird around the guy I like”.
Beauty
I think this is probably one of my favourite discussions throughout this whole blog. Mainly because I literally see so many 14-year-old girls look like they are going on 20 years old… and that is scary.I began to ask Kimberly and Jennifer how long it takes them to usually get ready in the morning before school. Kim explained that it roughly takes her around an hour to get ready, ensuring she looks presentable and ready to take on the day. Kim states however that when it comes to the weekend, there is nobody to impress, so she doesn’t spend so much time getting ready when she wakes up. Jennifer on the other hand , went on to explain that she is usually rushing out the door, and that it takes her around 20 minutes to do her makeup.
Do you wear makeup to school? If so name the products specifically that you use. Kimberly- “Yes I do wear makeup to school each day. I wear sometimes eyeliner, mascara, foundation, highlighter, eyeshadow and lipstick”.
Jennifer- “yes I do wear makeup, I wear bbcream, eyeshadow, mascara and lip chap”.
Okay first of all, I am mind blown, I don’t even know how my sister knows about highlighter but I would have never known what the hell that was in grade 9! I think I literally wore mascara and that was it, like I said, I really did not care what I looked like each day whatsoever. Β This answer blew me away. Even some of my sisters friends look like models and they are 14 years old, I lierally am left speachless looking at some of theirInstagram pictures. Do I think they are growing up way too fast? Absolutely. But would you get made fun of if you did not behave like this, probably. Welcome to this generation, how would they know any better?
Would you ever go without makeup to school? Kimberly-“I did not wear makeup the other day to school. I couldnβt stand the first period without it and it was bothering me so much. After first period, I put it on,Β simply because I brought it in my bag. You could say I prefer wearing makeup Β to school”. I personally think that a lot of young girls feel the need to wear makeup and look a certain way. I think more young girls should be promoted and influenced to go natural and to show off what God gave them. Like I stated earlier.. would this be considered normal?
Education
Lastly, I got onto the discussion of education and what happens inside and outside of the classroom.. I had asked Kimberly and Jennifer how much homework they usually get at night. Kimberly explained that she usually finishes all her homework in class, but if she doesn’t finish it, she usually has aout half hour of homework at night time. Kim also stated that she usually does not finish all of her homework because she gets bored very easily. I wonder however, if the teachers check on the homework if it is complete or not. I remember my teachers would go around with homework checks to see if you completed all of your homework. I also remembered that we would get in a lot of trouble if you did not finish it all.
Jennifer went on to explain that she gets very little homework at night now, but used to get around 2 hours of homework each night. She then went onto explain how she too gets bored of homework and sometimes does not finish it all.
Do you text or message people in class? Kimberly-“Some classes I cant have my phone but I bring it anyway and still go on it. I however, mostly just listen to music on it”.Β I remember being scared shitless to have my phone out in some of my classes, mostly because the teacher would call you out on it. I never really had my phone out ever when I was in grade 9, I was honestly too scared.
So, now that I compared generations, can you see the scary difference? By no means am I judging, but this was a huge eye opener to how fast this generation is growing up and changing. I really hope you guys enjoyed reading this blog post, I thought it was so interesting coming up with and getting to know the ins and outs of 14-year-old girls these days. I hope you all enjoyed it as well. If you have any comments on this article be sure to write them down below, I want to hear some of your views on this. Be sure to follow my social media accounts to stay updated on my posts!
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Much love xo.
Hey beauts! I know I know , where have I been with my updated social anxiety group therapy sessions ? I sadly did not make it to my 6th session because it was a very long and bad day I was having ! I was actually surprised that I only missed one session out of my 8… that’s a record for me and I am very proud of that ! I have worked hard these past 7 weeks and have really pushed myself in my group therapy sessions , obviously attending them and trying to push myself further out of my comfort zone . I have learnt so much these past weeks it has literally been insane !! This week was super challenging for me , mostly because the exposures are getting more challenging and they are really trying to test your anxiety levels . I was not nervous whatsoever I was more excited this time .. why might you ask ? Because this is my second last therapy session ! Can you believe it ?! Where has the time gone ? I literally thought that this therapy was going to be a long 8 weeks , but it literally has flown by .
Hello beauts, hope you are all having a great night so far! Basically, I am on a roll with the blogging mainly because my boyfriend is on nights for a few days so I get a lot of “me time” which hey…. I am not complaining about whatsoever. I find blogging to be myΒ happy place and a place where I can relax. Β So for this blog, I decided to spice it up with a collaborationΒ from someone who you guys are not too familiar with but hey I’m “thatothertwin_xo” for a reason! You guys are going to get to know my better half on a more personal note, my beautiful twin Stefanie Hotrum. I am really excited to share with you guys more about her as a person, but more specifically.. an artist. Yes I did say, artist. I was not blessed with this talent whatsoever, thanks mom and dad! No, but honestly, my sister is one of the most talented people I know when it comes to art and her paintings. Stefanie is obviously 23 like myself, but she looks absolutely nothing like me. Aside from myself being a dirty blonde, she is a complete blonde who is 6’1…. am I am 5’7…crazy eh? She is covered in tattoos, I literally lost count how many! Meanwhile, I only have one tattoo so far, you can say she is more the rebellious type as opposed to me.
Did you take any art classes before? “In high school, I took a few general art courses. I had tried to get into Graphic Design. Although it did have that “Life Drawing” course I loved, I found in the end, it was way too technical for me involving photoshop. So who knows for the future! But I’m definitely more of a hands-on girl”. I personally think that photoshop would be too much for me to handle as well. I even find Macbooks hard to use, I am more of an Acer girl that is for sure. I think that having this talent can be shown in a variety of different ways. Stefanie does not need photoshop when it comes to a canvas and a paintbrush. All she needs is her creative and open mindset. Stefanie has always succeeded well in her art classes, as I have taken a few with her in the past. It was no competition for my drawings to look like stick figures compared to her’s let’s just say! haha!
A lot of people inspire us every day, and I am always interested in seeing who inspires other people, especially my twin. Stefanie states, “the very first person to inspire me to paint was Lucy Ford. She was the first one I ever followed on instagram towards art. She showed me that to be successful, it just takes practice and effort. You don’t need school (although it helps) or you don’t need some desk job to bring in a successful income. Sure it’s gonna take some work, but it’s possible. She’s now living in California at the age of 24, living her dream and sharing her art with her fans”. I then proceeded to ask Stef what her best piece of advice would be to someone who is just starting out in art.She expresses, “continue with it! So many times I hear, “but I don’t have that talent, or they’re better than ill ever be. Or I CAN’T do it, so why try?” Well, everyone has to start somewhere, that’s life. If it makes you happy, do it for you! You don’t even need a subject with art, that’s the beauty of it. It just takes practice and time.Β Also, don’t get discouraged with mistakes. If I’ve learned one thing as an artist, it’s that you need an open mind. Go with your mistakes. People don’t know they’re mistakes”.Β I hear you sister, and that is exactly what I did with blogging. I randomly just went for it even though I did know a gd damn thing about it or have never really written too many things before besides a forced essay. It does take time and practice, but go and follow where your heart is telling you. You will honestly be surprised at where you may just find yourself, you could find your calling like I have.
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