We’ve all been there, well most of us anyways, have been on some sort of dating site in the past. I recently have been single now for about maybe more than like 7 months or 8 months, to be honest, I completely forget, but it’s been a little while now. I have to say going on these dating sites has really opened my eyes, both in a good and bad way. Don’t get me wrong, I have met some really nice people on these sites for sure, some really down to earth and friendly guys, who are serious about finding relationships. But if I had written a blog post about all the wonderful men I have met, then well… it wouldn’t be too interesting and I would have left out all the weird, freaky and gross online dating stories for you beauts. So a little bit of background information, I have been on two dating sites for the past couple of months now. I have been on Tinder, which everyone knows what the hell it is, and secondly, I have been on Bumble which is a newer site to me that I have just recently been on. My friend recommended me to try out this site and give it a go. The only difference about this site is the girl has to speak to the guy first when they match. This really didn’t bother me that much, I am used to usually speaking first to the guy, that is no biggie. So I decided to give these two sites a go. I can honestly say I have been on a handful of dates, and I think when you are single it’s good to get out there and see what you want in a guy, I find nothing wrong with that whatsoever. For the purpose of this blog, I am of course going to leave names out of this, for respect and confidentiality ( I am not that mean of a person). So shall we get started with some of my horror stories when it comes to Tinder and Bumble experiences that I have had?
First, I had gone on a date with this guy that I started talking to on bumble. He seemed like a really funny guy, and if you have a good sense of humour that usually attracts me a bunch. This guy seemed super nice and down to earth as well, so we have been talking for a bit now and finally decided to go on a date. When we were trying to make the plans, I go a bit of a red flag because he suggested we hang out on a Friday night and just relax and stay in. If you beauts know me, I like to be wined and dined that’s for sure. Like this is your first impression and you wanted to just stay in on the beginning of the weekend and chat? ( I was not down for this). So me being bold, I decided to speak up and suggest going for a drink ( buddy… it’s a Friday night, I am only young once). So he agreed, and he came and picked me up and we were on our way to a pub to sit down and have a drink. So everything was going good, I decided to be a badass and order a double rum and coke, just because it was Friday. We were chatting away, but I knew right away that there was a no connection whatsoever, but I was trying to enjoy myself. So about halfway through he randomly stops talking. I thought maybe he just was nervous so I gave him the benefit of the doubt and let him gather his thoughts for a few minutes because sometimes I run out of things to talk about sometimes. After about 5 minutes went by I knew something was up and things started getting really awkward. It literally looked like we were just sipping on drinks and looking around (just picture it now, super awkward). SO the waitress is coming by constantly, and now I am starting to pound back the double rum and cokes ( usually like to keep it classy on dates, but at this point, I needed to be drunk because it was painful). I am not one to watch sports that often by the way, and it got so awkward I started to watch basketball on the televisions at the bar. He finally perked up and actually asked, “So you really like basketball eh?“. I was trying so hard not to laugh, and I was literally thinking, “oh my goodness please take me home“. Finally, after about 2 hours, I finally said, “well did you want to head out?!”, and he states, “I mean if you want to we can?”, I am like, “okay, let’s do this”. Overall he was a nice guy and everything but like talk to me, I don’t bite! Let’s just say most awkward date I have been on ever.
The next Bumble story I have for you guys is about my personal “stalker” to say the least. This guy is a keeper. So I matched with him on Bumble a while back, a good looking guy full of tats and had a nose piercing (something about nose piercings on a guy get’s me going). So we had literally matched around 8 pm at night one night, and that same night he asked me to hang out. Usually, I do not hang out with someone on the same night but I literally had nothing I was doing so I thought, “hey why the hell not?“. So keep this in mind, we literally had no set time we were going to meet at, I told him I lived in Hamilton and he was from another city. I did not mention my address yet, but he was going to come and pick me up. So I had mentioned that I needed to get ready still but I would message him when I am done. So I finally finished getting ready and he proceeds to say to me, “make sure you wear something slutty!”, with a happy face. I could not believe this guy, I literally called him out and replied, ” you do know you are not getting anything tonight right”? He then states, ” well you never know what could happen“. I was so furious and that was so disrespectful to say to a girl, like come on man. So I then blocked and deleted his number because clearly this guy only had one thing on his mind and that was it. I felt like I did not need to give him any explanation as to why I did that cause well… he was a pig to say the least. Two hours went by and I randomly start getting about 4 calls from this random number, and texts from it. I was literally thinking, “ what the f***?!“. I start reading the messages and it was the guy who I was supposed to meet up with! He was literally reaming me a new one saying how I stood him up, how he drove all the way to Hamilton to come see me, and that I wouldn’t answer the phone (keep in mind this guy has no idea where I live okay), and he was so ticked at me, and could not believe how disrespectful I was. I was blown away. How disrespectful I was?!Are you kidding me!? I was so thrown off, I blocked and deleted that number as well. A few days pass now and I get a message on Instagram from this random account, keep in mind he did not have any social media accounts whatsoever. This guy, that same stalker guy, makes an Instagram account to message me on there and start reaming me out on there now! This guy has balls I tell you. I could not believe it. He was SO MAD beauts, and I could not emphasize that enough. So doing what I do best, I blocked and deleted him on there as well. I never gave this guy the satisfaction he wanted and replied to him, I just deleted him out of my life. SO that was my stalker story, this guy was a little too intense for my liking, but hey… you brought this upon yourself bud.
These next few stories are a little bit shorter in length but they are ones that I had to include for sure. I have had some real keepers on these sites, some are just like literally, “what the f***”, so be prepared! This next one, I was chatting with a guy on Bumble, and he seemed again friendly, good-looking, maybe looked a little bit cocky but I thought I would see where it went. So he was from another city and wanted to hang out, so we were deciding on what to do when we hung out. He wanted to keep it simple and come over with a bottle of wine ( we all know what he is thinking), I like to go out in public to go out for dinner or grab some drinks. He then proceeds to say this beauty of a line, ” so when are we banging out, I mean * hanging out”, with a winky face. Bye Felicia. You can go “bang out” somewhere else, LMFAO. I was so disgusted I actually burst out laughing. Does this guy really get anywhere with these cheesy pickup lines? So that was banging out boy, and I still can’t believe how forward guys can be on these sites, but I mean, it is Tinder and Bumble we are talking about here. It just frustrates me because maybe some girls, like myself, are actually looking to meet someone to potentially be in a relationship with them.
This next story always makes me laugh and I swear to god I felt so dumb for even swiping right for this guy. So I found this guy on Tinder this time, and we were chatting away, good-looking man. So he had a unicorn emoji in his bio and I honest to god did not think anything of it whatsoever. I thought maybe he just likes unicorns or is completely random one of the two. So he then proceeds to ask me, “did you see the unicorn in my bio?“, I’m like, “Yes, why?”. He then asks, “do you know what that means?”, being dumb I was literally like, “that you like unicorns?“, he was like, “no no no“. He then goes on to tell me that he and his girlfriend are looking for a third, and they wanted to know if I ever considered doing that. That honestly is not my thing, and I have nothing against people that are into those sort of things, but it’s just not for me. So now I know what a unicorn is and stay far away from people who have those in their bio. Honest to god, I felt like the biggest idiot, and I am pretty sure I am the only one who did not know about that kind of thing, I was so confused.
The next one is a classic, literally the classic “he stood me up stories“. Yes, yes I have been stood up twice, and it is not the nicest most lovely feeling in the world, to say the least. I have made plans with people, they knew my address and completely never showed, so you get those lovely bunch of people as well, which is amazing…not. I just do the simple block and delete, like why give them a second chance, f*** that crap, I don’t have time for that. Assholes. Some guy literally asked me to be his valentine , like buddy, how you going to be my valentine if you can’t show up for a first date?! Keep dreaming .
The best one is when you go on a date with someone who looks absolutely nothing like their picture, that is super fun. It really sucks trying to hide your disappointment when you meet them in their car, it’s so hard I can not even emphasize it enough! Like, please, update your pictures, or at least look a bit like them and not surprise the hell out of someone when you meet them. That blows.
I can not forget about the instant dick pics, those are quite lovely as well. Literally asking a guy how his day is going then BAM, ” here’s my dick”, like alright , cool. I didn’t ask for that nor do I really care. Can we just have a normal conversation, k thanks, you can put Princess Sophia away now.
I can honestly say finding your husband on these sites is almost near to impossible but I congratulate the couples who did find each other on these sites, you found rare beautiful people! I can clearly say I have been on a shit ton of dates, and a lot have been kinda crappy but some have been pretty good. I think this is such a learning experience being on these sites, and I don’t think it’s a bad thing to go on lots of dates, hell you are single AF you do what you want to do. I am single AF I am going to do what I want to do and that is that. But these sites I find are full of the most random people I have ever met, and sometimes I do get a good laugh from them. So three things to take away from this blog post today:
- you are a bad ass b**** and deserve the best.
- thank you to the individuals who were apart of these wonderful stories
- I am sorry you got stuck with a blogger who loves to blog about everything… surprise!
I hope you beauts enjoyed this more amusing blog post that I came up with from my personal dating stories on these two glorious sites. Be sure to subscribe to my channel if you have not already and follow my other social media sites located on my main page! Take care and much love xo.